Piink&Bubblii’s Neighborhood

For any of you out there still reading this, I'm putting this blog to sleep until next spring's writing assignment. I am going to make an effort not to turn into a total blogging loser like I did last year, so I'll still be posting at Highly Appallified. Head on over there and let me know if you're still posting so I can keep reading. To all my 8th graders specifically, great job on the blogs, and I hope you keep posting! Best of luck ladies and gentlemen.

2008 8th grade promotion is history, but some parents couldn't resist throwing in a few last minute lessons.

The bad thing about helmet laws (like a lot of other well-meaning laws that govern personal behaviors) is that they often have effects that run counter to what they are trying to achieve. Helmet laws surely aim to decrease head injuries among cyclists, but studies indicate that fatalities as a percentage actually increase when helmet laws go into effect. Experts suggests that individuals become used to a particular level of risk (for example, riding a bike without a helmet). As soon as that level of risk decreases (helmets become mandatory) then those individuals will change their behavior in order to get back to that level of risk that they are comfortable with (perhaps riding a bike a bit more recklessly). So in this case, helmet laws are directly correlated with an increase in the effect that they are trying to prevent.

Well that sucks.

Look, if I'm going to smack my head on concrete, metal, dirt, or snow, I'm definitely going to want a helmet. A helmet will help prevent injury in an instance where my head is smacking against something hard. People should be educated about this, and they should feel like lame-o's for riding around town with helmets hanging on handlebars. But lawmakers should feel like lame-o's for making laws governing behavior that won't result in anyone being harmed besides the individual in question. And they should feel even cheesier when the law shows asociation with increasing serious injury, even when the amount of cyclists is DECREASING! Maybe we can pass a law that will forbid any current cyclist from reducing their cycling activity. We can set minimum levels of acceptable cycling. Cycling controls. For the good of the community.

I am in favor of helmets. They should be worn. My son will wear a helmet. There's just really nothing cool about third parties making decisions for other people without their permission. Or maybe we're better off letting the smart people make the important decisions for us.

Wearing helmets may never be cool (although an argument can be made that staying alive is cool, and as a victim of three concussions, two with a helmet on, I'll put a bowl on my skull any time), but some people are so afraid of looking dorky in a helmet that they commit a far more heinous act of nerdiness. If you live in place where helmets are mandated by law, and I know all 8 of you who read this blog do (yes, I've quadrupled my readership), then undoubtedly you've seen what I'm about to describe.

Poor kid will never be cool

Afraid of looking like the helmet-sporting dweeb on the cover of the helmet package, most folks concerned with looking cool adamantly oppose any form of brain protection. Of course, mommy and daddy say they have to, either because they truly care, or because they truly care about having to pay a citation because junior is not following the helmet law. So Joe Cool gets ready to pedal away to school, and mom asks to see the helmet, so Joe shows mom and straps it on, then pedals away. As soon as he's out of sight, helmet comes off. I mean, helmets are lame, bro. It ends up on the handlebars, clanging away with every pedal, banging on Joe's knees. Oops it just fell off as he's crossing the street. Now he's got to go back and get it. That was embarrassing. But not as embarrassing as actually having to wear the helmet. It's much cooler to have it slap inconveniently against one's knees, plus it adds a nice rhythm to the ride. Pedal, bump, dlink. Pedal, bump, dlink. Pedal, bump, dlink.

I'm just wondering why backpacks haven't followed suit. How cool is it to have a gigantic bulge rounding out your back? Kills the whole cool vibe. Much better to hang it on the other handlebar. Then the rider can look cool, and the bike will be the loser wearing the helmet and backpack.

Someone get this dweeb some handlebars.

The only thing about the helmet on the handlebars thing is that it kind of sends a double message. On one hand it whispers, "I'm cool, I don't actually wear my helmet. See? It's on my handlebars, not my head." But on the other hand, it says "well my mom said I have to wear it, and I'm scared of her. And I'm scared of other people. Dang, I'm pretty much scared of everyone. But I know what cool is all about."

Obviously it's about riding around town with your helmet on your handlebars. 

How many houses have you lived in? How is where you live now different from where you grew up?

1..2..3..  4..5..6.    6houses. and one of them i lived in for 8years and thats the one i live at now. 

The more I think about this, the more I worry about the outside chance that I really might not be as cool as I think I am. Probably the coolest thing I do is snowboard, and even that's just because the temperature is literally cold. Most "snowboarders," at least the ones I come into contact with on a regular basis, bug the crap out of me. And they're the cool ones. I wear a helmet. That's not really that cool. I've been knocked unconscious 3 times, and one of them was in a bench clearing brawl in college--sort of cool, but also sort of wimpy-sounding. One of my ribs popped out of place and never went back. Cool, yet weird in an oddball way, so maybe not cool?

I was an English major in college. The frames of my glasses are fat (kinda cool) because they need to cover my even fatter lenses (kinda not cool). In college one of my friends said if I looked at a map I would see people waving (neat, but not cool). 

I had head gear and an upper mouth expander which created a licorice-size gap between my two front teeth. Not cool. But being able to drink a soda through a straw WHILE my teeth were clenched? Pretty freakin' cool.

I was homeschooled. Not cool. But cool.

I use big, uncool words like "wince." Yeah, count 'em. All five letters. Apparently that's a big word to some people. Uncool. Yet, cool.

 Cool is conformity. Cool is nonconformity. Cool people think other cool people aren't cool. Those "uncool" people look up at the other cool people and scoff: "How utterly uncool." 

It would be easy to perceive coolness as subjective, something that is to be found "in the eye of the beholder." This, however, is little more than postmodern drivel, and in my future posts, I will attempt to objectively lay out some of the defining principles of "cool"--an "absolute truth" of cool, if you will. 

A great man once said "only lay down true principles, and adhere to them inflexibly."

Now, I say to you: "only lay down true principles of coolness, and adhere to them inflexibly."

I will show you those principles. Adhere to them inflexibly, and next time someone asks you who to thank for making you cool, remember the ViP Rooster.

P.S.: See my previous post on mustaches for an immediate immersion into the doctrine of cool.

 

yess another one. but seriously, this is like my first post ever, using this computer. my new one. i cant believe it. for one whole year i had suffered with a beige 2000 desktop and now im using like a computer people dream of. seriously im using a DELL AMD Athlon64 with a 500 gb harddrive, 3 gb ram, and dual core processor. and i have a 19 inch LCD screen. instead of that faded beige computer that had a darkened screen. haha i wish i only had a pic. its so sexy. i love it.

 ana blanco is a small pretty girl that attends Upland Junior High. She is a really nice person cares about her friends maybe more than her family at times. I may have not have passed some of my 8th grade's hardest times if it wasnt for her. ive only knew her for like 6 months but thats enough time for someone to become an important person in my life. I've met a lot of great people because of her aswell. we have done alot in the past 6 months though. its not even funny. well actually it is because ana cant stop herself from tripping all over the place so im constantly laughing at her. like when we went to Del Taco one day she came over, she wanted to go down this small hill and when she came across this crack she fell and got a micro sized scrape which she whined about the rest of the day because shes a little girl.literally. she got hurt but it was too funny and i was laughing on the inside. sorry ana. ana has been through too much for one person to take in one year, i dont even know how she made it. but thats ana. i only wish i was half as good as a person ana is.